Looking back at the beginning

When my son was born my husband and I left everything in the hands of our healthcare provider. Being first time parents we had no idea what we were doing. Many of us go through the transition into parenthood terrified because now YOU are the one responsible for another human life. Our son had a bit of a rough start, fortunately nothing too major but for us it was scary. For the majority of my pregnancy I was living in bliss. Excited for what was to come and meeting our son for the first time. It wasn’t until about week 32 or 33 at a routine checkup that things became stressful in a way. I am here to share my experience and why I feel it’s important to take control and advocate for yourself.

Taking control and advocating for yourself.

I had just hit the 3rd trimester and they say that’s when the baby starts to gain the most weight. However, during previous appointments none of the nurses showed any concern until that 32 week mark. This nurse almost scolded me saying I was measuring 2 weeks ahead and it shouldn’t be. Mind you, I hadn’t gained more weight than I was supposed to. I was still very much within my weight range for my size according to my doctor. She immediately told me I needed to watch cmy weight and I shouldn’t be gaining anything else. She also said if I continued to gain weight my baby would destroy me coming out. Sounds ridiculous but the lack of filter she had was baffling.

I cried all the way home. Being a first time mom, that overwhelming feeling of guilt kicked in. A request for a growth scan was put in for 35 weeks, by then my son was measuring 7lbs 5oz. It was only THEN that my healthcare provider started to show concern. However, there was mention of induction at 39 weeks because they didn’t want him to go past that given his size. That was a challenge in itself, communication trying to get the induction approved and scheduled was awful. No one would get back to me or give me any clear information. Thankfully my son decided to come on his own at 38 weeks + 4days. It wasn’t until full blown labor in the hospital that it was revealed an induction was scheduled for the following week.

After my son was born the desire to take control and advocate was more important than ever.

I had a very long labor, 30+ hours but I opted for the epidural so it slowed the process down. An epidural is scary, however it was the best choice given everything they had to do during deliver. The doctor was sure he wasn’t going to be anything over 8 pounds. To her surprise, he was 9lbs 4oz. The look of complete shock on her face was proof enough that we needed to start advocating for ourselves more. My son was having trouble passing through the pubic bone due to his size. I was pushing for 3 hours, completely exhausted and not making any progress. Finally I said enough was enough and I needed help.

The doctor explained my options and they were all scary. C-section was not one of the options. Instead it was the vacuum, the forceps or one other option that I can’t remember now as this was almost 3 years ago now. I opted for the vacuum and she went over the possible complications and brought in the whole team to be on stand by. It was a hard choice to make because none of it felt right. I know it was traumatic for him. It was traumatic for me just watching what was taking place as I was continuing to try and push. My poor baby had a very large hematoma in his head, obviously because it was such a brutal process. This caused him to have bad jaundice leading to light therapy for 12 hours with as little interruption as possible.

on top of the jaundice, he was having a reflux problem. The nurses kept brushing it off saying he just had fluid that still needed to come out from birth. We knew that seemed off but took their word. He would almost be gasping for air and my husband would have to jump up and grab him because it sounded so awful. I still believe because of that, I wasn’t able to breastfeed him easily. He had the hardest time latching but they swore he didn’t have a tie so I felt very defeated. Little did we know, this reflux issue would last to this day at 2 and a half. Though it has improved significantly, I talk about changes I made in a previous post.

Jumping forward

My son’s pediatrician kept brushing off he fact that he had a reflux issue. He was adamant that he would grow out of it eventually. However, that was not sitting well with me. My son was having food, milk, water really anything he ingested constantly coming back up. He was having to re-chew his food and swallow it and I know that was not pleasant for him. It was not just once of twice a day, it was several times within an hour all day long. I pushed for a referral to a specialist by the time he was 1 and a half. At first his doctor said he would reach out to the department and asked about acid reflux medication but I declined that. I wanted to speak with the specialist myself, not just bandage the situation.

Several weeks of communication went by and we decided to use the acid reflux medication to subdue the symptoms temporarily. Due to the need for further analysis, a pediatric surgeon brought in. They ordered a gastric barium study and found something called a vascular ring. An MRI was the next step for further analysis. The MRI confirmed the anomaly, however, his was not a complete ring as it was not wrapping around both the trachea and esophagus. His was only indenting on the esophagus yet the surgeon was sure that was not the cause for the reflux. I did my own research and from what I was reading, it can definitely contribute to the reflux but in his case they didn’t feel it was severe enough.

Though, the surgeon brought in a cardiologist for review and she put a stop to the whole thing. Leaving us with no answers and no help. Back to square one, we were solely dependent on medication that he was not to take long term. That’s when I started taking things into my own hands and working to find a solution. Since then, we have switched providers and we have gone without medication for the last 4 months. I have started making some improvements to our daily diets which has made drastic changes for our son. I was never one to live a super holistic lifestyle but since seeing the major improvements minor things have made for my son, I am now devoted to learning more.

Making the switch

Not only is making the switch to healthier options benefiting my son but it’s also been mandatory for me. Being pregnant with baby #2 I was diagnosed fairly early on with gestational diabetes. Originally my new primary doctor wasn’t concerned about my A1C readings even though they were high. I requested to speak to a dietitian myself because she suggested just eating a lower sugar diet. Thank goodness I made the request because immediately they wanted me treated for gestational diabetes. Monitoring will continue 6 weeks after baby is born to see if I am truly diabetic. Advocating for yourself and listening to your gut is so important. Putting it off and waiting may have caused me to have major complications with my pregnancy if I hadn’t.

Needless to say, my entire diet had to change. I have been on long acting insulin for my fasting levels. I’ve cut out the majorly processed foods and stuck to whole organic foods. Significantly limited my processed sugar intake, believe me that is a challenge with the pregnancy cravings. It has been a mental battle this whole time and I still have fear of having a large baby at the end of this. I am also fearful of being diabetic for the rest of my life, it is not an easy road by any means. All this to say, what we put in our body matters. We may not realize it at first but everything plays a part.

Our environment, our food, cosmetics, hygiene , pleasures such as candles, incense, and diffusers, household items and cleaning products all play a part. This is why I have started making small changes at home for my family. You don’t notice the effects until you have a problem and sometimes those problems can be severe. In my last post I shared products that I am switching to, though there are so many other things I plan to switch. There is no being 100% perfect, but making as many conscious decisions as we can, can make a huge difference. So, I hope more people will find the confidence in speaking up and advocating for themselves when needed. That is not to say doubt everything your provider has to say, they are the medical professionals.

Conclusion

I hope this post shines light for someone else going through a rough situation. As I said, these are not major problems but for us being first time parents, it was scary. Our medical field has done some amazing things, I have had some amazing providers. However, I have also had some that brush me off completely and I was always afraid to push for things. Don’t be afraid to speak up when you know something isn’t right. They are the professionals, yes, but they don’t know our individual bodies like we do. I’d love for others to share their experiences and what changes you have made to better yours or your families health! Follow me on Pinterest for more post updates 🙂